chitika

Showing posts with label 10 wishes. Show all posts
Showing posts with label 10 wishes. Show all posts

Thursday, June 24, 2010

10 evil wishes for the internet repairman

Not that I am unhappy with the internet man... Oh no. I've enjoyed being handcuffed at home for 1 1/2 days, waiting... for him... to fix my internet connection... actually refix it... because he 'fixed it' last night... or not so much.

So I hereby offer 10 heartfelt wishes for my internet company.

1) I wish they would get life in the electric chair.

2) I wish they would be told the technician will turn off their electric chair sometime before 7pm, so they shouldn't go anywhere.

3) I wish their management ongoing success as they continue to also manage the French World Cup soccer team.

4) I wish that their virginal 14-year-old daughters go on the road with best friend Miley Cyrus...

5) I wish that they personally lose the next iPhone prototype and get to experience Steve Jobs eating their liver.

6) I wish them to be force-fed nuclear hot Indian currie and gallons of peppermint Schnaps and Milk of Magnesia.

7) I wish that Jack Bauer believes they killed his girlfriend. DAMMIT.

8) I wish that BP be responsible for their swimming pool.

9) I wish that at every future dinner party, they sit with VP Joe Biden, Ozzy Osbourne and the people who make infomercials.

10)And I wish that readers would leave their personal wishes for their internet provider in comments below...



Click on 'comments' below and add your two cents!

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